I understand the discomfort with being assumed to be a member of the majority when you're not. (It happens to me all the time with being a political minority in the social circles I travel in.) But I think it's entirely unavoidable in any society. We have to make assumptions about people.
How would you prefer I behave if I don't know you have a disability? Should I treat everyone I meet as potentially having a disability, even if they appear perfectly healthy? What does it even mean to treat someone as (potentially) having a disability, since I should basically treat disabled people the same as "normals" anyway? Certainly there's something wrong with finding out and saying something to the effect of, "Gosh, I didn't know you were defective." But there's nothing wrong with, "Gosh, I didn't know that about you."
Similarly with being Jewish. Should everyone be required to ask for your religion before wishing you a merry Christmas? I think it's fine to make the assumption that someone is in a majority group, as long as you don't react badly when your assumption is proven wrong.
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How would you prefer I behave if I don't know you have a disability? Should I treat everyone I meet as potentially having a disability, even if they appear perfectly healthy? What does it even mean to treat someone as (potentially) having a disability, since I should basically treat disabled people the same as "normals" anyway? Certainly there's something wrong with finding out and saying something to the effect of, "Gosh, I didn't know you were defective." But there's nothing wrong with, "Gosh, I didn't know that about you."
Similarly with being Jewish. Should everyone be required to ask for your religion before wishing you a merry Christmas? I think it's fine to make the assumption that someone is in a majority group, as long as you don't react badly when your assumption is proven wrong.