ext_129502 ([identity profile] matt-rah.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] gaudior 2009-08-12 05:06 am (UTC)

First off, let me say that I really like posts on these sorts of topics, [livejournal.com profile] gaudior, and I greatly enjoy reading them.

Another thing you have posted about is people in non-mainstream subcultures (I remember a post about how being non-mainstream relates to therapy, for example). And I think that topic is the beginning of the answer to your question, [livejournal.com profile] angstnokami. I think the degree to which people are unhappy within their gender roles, whether they are conscious of it or not, depends largely on how far outside the mainstream (however you want to define that) they fall. And, to a lesser extent, how much their outside-the-mainstream-ness (wow that's awkward, sorry) is supported by their local community/environment.

As a short man with physical disabilities, dating and romantic relationships have been really, really hard for me. I have always felt that a lot of this had to do with the fact that there are a number of gender role expectation type things I simply can't fulfill. As I have been able to find romantic partners who don't care about those things, my unhappiness with how I fall outside of gender norms has begun to abate, although my awareness of it remains.

Matt

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