ext_3640 ([identity profile] gaudior.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] gaudior 2009-08-14 02:34 pm (UTC)

Do you actually find that you personally get treated in the stereotypical Ways Women Get Treated, to a significant extent?

Interesting question. Lessee...

people assume I'm not capable with power tools

I've definitely had that one-- a guy who doesn't know me being surprised that I have power tools, or make it clear that he didn't think I could be useful with them.

or my fists

I'm pretty sure this is what was going on when I've had guys warn me that I shouldn't walk a certain stretch of road alone because there were "tough characters" there and I might get hurt-- at least, they seemed to see no reason they shouldn't be there. The implication I got was definitely "you shouldn't be there alone because you couldn't defend yourself."

be seen as being here to take care of and please men

I think that's what's going on when everyone assumes the women will clear and clean up after a dinner party. Or when (and this happens to me a lot) guys come up to me on the street when I'm feeling bad and say "Smile! I want to see you smiling!"

be hit on (or hassled, or raped) because someone's trying to prove his power

I have never (thank the gods) been raped. I have had people "hit on" me in contexts where it clearly was not that he genuinely wanted a date (e.g., shouting at me from car windows, shouting "dykes!" at me and my wife/girlfriend, etc).

people to value my breasts over my abilities

I have no direct evidence for this one.

people to assume I don't need a steady paycheck because my father/husband will take care of me

Again, no direct evidence. I note that in the clinic where I work, most of the clinicians are female, and we don't make enough money to actually support a family. But I'm not sure whether, in a setting where most of the employees were male and similarly entry-level, the pay would be better.

sit with my legs crossed

I've had a supervisor criticize me for not being "lady-like" when I sat with my legs comfortably apart.

be seen as weird or unkempt for not wearing make-up

This was more a problem in high school than now. On the other hand, when I was interviewing for internships in grad school, I always had a hard time, despite the fact that I'm really competent, and everyone I've ever actually worked with praises me highly. But again, this one is uncertain-- there could be other explanations besides this (and I've always assumed it was because I came across as nervous).

So... yes, I have directly experienced a lot of these. But it's also true that it's sometimes subtle, or unclear.

I dunno... shall I make a poll, and see what other people's experience is?

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