I may not have the requisite experience to speak on this subject. (Indeed, I've been told by many that my genitalia precludes me from ever having anything relevant to contribute to such conversations - the perverse humor of such a statement notwithstanding and largely unnoticed by adherents.)
Having sufficiently disclaimed any credentials, let me proceed in that great American tradition: truckin' right along anyway. :)
The Taoist in me cringes a little when I hear people talking about the energy they spend being themselves. Stable states of being, my belief goes, shouldn't require energy to maintain, and your Self should always be the most stable of states. What this suggests, to me, is that you spend energy dwelling on the matter or the state of the world around you, and certainly it is understandable that these things upset you. My concern is that the dwelling is negatively impacting you. Your statements definitely suggest that you feel held back by the expenditure. Insofar as the expenditure is on the dwelling, however, you have the means to answer your own question by changing how you spend your energy. Keep in mind, always, that no matter what the world around you - you are no more or less you than at any other point. Learning to let these influences slick off of you reduces any need to spend energy resisting them. You can become impervious to them.
I believe your statement speaks less to your inner self, however, and more addresses resistance you face to your professional and social activities. This isn't so easily defeated, of course, but that's where I cringe again. Energy spent railing ineffectually against a societal condition is energy wasted. Consider how long it has taken to move from your favorite point in the history of feminism to today. Consider how many people gave of themselves to make all that happen. Some of them became Feminists (tm) to do it. Your statement suggests that you want to be something else - my advice under those circumstances would be: go be that something else.
This isn't so much a 'forget about the movement' thing, it's a 'healer heal thyself' thing. Well timed, well considered actions buy you more bang for your buck than constant effort across inopportune moments. Shop around for 'good buys' and save your energy for yourself, your growth, and your own enjoyment. Even if you spend all that energy pushing the world closer to where you want it, if you make all that energy well spent, you'll be satisfied with who you are (or so I suspect).
Again, YMMV. :)
(For what it's worth I think you're pretty awesome and amazing.)
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branchandroot
Your Mileage May Vary(tm)
Date: 2009-08-12 02:19 am (UTC)Having sufficiently disclaimed any credentials, let me proceed in that great American tradition: truckin' right along anyway. :)
The Taoist in me cringes a little when I hear people talking about the energy they spend being themselves. Stable states of being, my belief goes, shouldn't require energy to maintain, and your Self should always be the most stable of states. What this suggests, to me, is that you spend energy dwelling on the matter or the state of the world around you, and certainly it is understandable that these things upset you. My concern is that the dwelling is negatively impacting you. Your statements definitely suggest that you feel held back by the expenditure. Insofar as the expenditure is on the dwelling, however, you have the means to answer your own question by changing how you spend your energy. Keep in mind, always, that no matter what the world around you - you are no more or less you than at any other point. Learning to let these influences slick off of you reduces any need to spend energy resisting them. You can become impervious to them.
I believe your statement speaks less to your inner self, however, and more addresses resistance you face to your professional and social activities. This isn't so easily defeated, of course, but that's where I cringe again. Energy spent railing ineffectually against a societal condition is energy wasted. Consider how long it has taken to move from your favorite point in the history of feminism to today. Consider how many people gave of themselves to make all that happen. Some of them became Feminists (tm) to do it. Your statement suggests that you want to be something else - my advice under those circumstances would be: go be that something else.
This isn't so much a 'forget about the movement' thing, it's a 'healer heal thyself' thing. Well timed, well considered actions buy you more bang for your buck than constant effort across inopportune moments. Shop around for 'good buys' and save your energy for yourself, your growth, and your own enjoyment. Even if you spend all that energy pushing the world closer to where you want it, if you make all that energy well spent, you'll be satisfied with who you are (or so I suspect).
Again, YMMV. :)
(For what it's worth I think you're pretty awesome and amazing.)