Supplement to poll

[gaudior]

Please answer "yes" only if this is a genuine preference-- you like it better than any of the options offered in the previous poll.

[Poll #1453077]

Comments

[q10.livejournal.com]

prefer to what? i certainly don't prefer it to either of the two genuinely equal alternatives proposed earlier, although i could be convinced pretty easily that it'd represent a step in the right direction.

[occultatio.livejournal.com]

a) I'm laughing at the results as of right now, which show a complete (though statistically insignificant) divide between straight and queer responders. I think this is actually directly related to:

b) I object to your use of the word "prefer" in the question, because it is ambiguous what you are comparing your hypothetical situation to. Prefer to nothing at all? Prefer to the situation in MA, where you write from? Prefer to the situation in your own state? Prefer over complete legal and semantic equality? Prefer in the sense of "would be willing to settle for?"

[occultatio.livejournal.com]

Okay, upon scrolling further down my friends page, I see your previous post, so some of my confusion is alleviated, but my main point still stands.

[zdenka]

To avoid confusion, I wish to state that I did not vote in this poll.

[thespooniest.livejournal.com]

Likewise, because as others point out, preference is a relative thing: to what are we asked to prefer or not prefer this situation? This is a question where people's interpretation could easily affect how they answer.

I

[ericaceous.livejournal.com]

I'd prefer that any dyad or group of people could get a civil union, that this status only imply household commitment and nothing about sex, and there not be marriages defined by the state at all. I abosolutely hate that the state is involved in intimate relationships, but for bureaucratic purposes, I feel like anyone should be able to be a household member/domestic partner/spouse if they agree to make a commitment to the other members of the household.

but I am sort of a radical about family structure issues. Ironic, since I've been in a monogamous dyad for quite a few years now.

Re: I

[gaudior.livejournal.com]

That makes sense to me. Do you think it's a good direction to spend political energy on?

Re: I

[ericaceous.livejournal.com]

Not really. Honestly, many of the things that people want marriage and marriage analogs for are things that could be addressed differently and in some cases, more fairly. In some cases, contracts can help meet some of the needs (for example, one can get medical powers of attorney) and universal rights/entitlements (like health care) would help take care of people who need marriage/unions to obtain those things. marriage and marriage analogs will give the most benefit to those with the most resources anyway. I would rather that we spend our political energy differently, looking after those who are the most vulnerable across the board, which includes many in LGBT communities. Instead, we tend to focus on what will most benefit those who already have a lot *since they have a lot of power too, and can manipulate the discussion).

I found this discussion, "Is Gay Marriage Racist", which I read first in That's Revolting: Queer Stratgies to resisting assimilation to be really helpful in thinking through some issues that were nagging at me but I couldn't quite put into words. It's really radical and I do not agree with every point they bring up, but it's an interesting read.

In some states, there are laws preventing things like second parent adoption, and I'd like to see these removed more than I'd like to see marriage and marriage analogs put into place.

[ifnotnow.livejournal.com]

Hi! Unrelated to this post (sorry), I'd like to write you an actual e-mail, but it's been so long that I don't even know your current e-mail address. Is there a way you can give me a clue here, or e-mail me (firstnamelastname@gmail.com, except it's not firstnamelastname, it's my first name and my last name) to let me know? Thanks!

[gaudior.livejournal.com]

Absolutely! It's gaudiorrr at gmail dot com! Looking forward to hearing from you-- it's been a while!

[gaudior.livejournal.com]

Um... okay, so I feel like most of these comments fall into the category of not having yet read the preceding post, and so not yet knowing that this was meant to be another option in that poll, really.

So if it's okay with y'all, I'm not going to answer them individually unless you ask me to.