How to Handle A Plague, 8) Sleep well.
Apr. 3rd, 2020 05:44 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gaudior8) Sleep well.
Easier said than done, right? But trouble sleeping is something that people are talking about a lot this week, and I certainly have many many suggestions for how to sleep better, so have a list.
Now, I'm not expecting that all of these will be new to you-- I would be surprised if they all were. But my hope is that a) some of them are new, and worth trying, and b) some of them are things you've tried before that worked for you, and it will remind you to do them again, and c) you may have some good tricks that are not on this list, which you can put in the replies.*
1) Exercise. I usually hesitate before suggesting this to people, but right now, staying in our homes, we are moving so much less than we usually do. No walking to the T, or biking to work, no being on our feet at work, some people are feeling really scared to leave the house and so having a lot of trouble getting that kind of exercise, and we are all much more stationary. And that can have pretty nasty effects on your mood, and your sleep (and your sleep can then affect your mood). So: try to be in motion. It doesn't have to be explicit exercise-- you can do lots of energetic cleaning, or furniture moving. You can go to an online dance party, or take a free online yoga class.. If you have small children, they would probably love for you to run around the living room with them, or carry them around, or even use them as your weights in strength training when you can't go to the gym. Just... try to be in motion more, every day.
2) Podcasts or audiobooks. These don't work for everyone, but if they work for you, they are particularly helpful-- it gives your mind something to focus on other than all your worried thoughts. Since the pandemic started, I have been falling asleep every night either to the audiobook of The Silmarillion as read by Martin Shaw, who has an amazing Intoning voice, or the Sleep With Me podcast. Sleep With Me bills itself as "Bedtime stories to help grown ups fall asleep in the deep, dark night." It is long, rambling, cheerfully inconsequential stories by a man who claims he is called Scooter, and whose creaky, dulcet tones will tell you about things that do not matter at all if you fall asleep in the middle of. It's caring, affirming (he always starts by welcoming, "ladies and gentlemen and friends from beyond the binary"), and I have never stayed awake more than about ten minutes into the podcast. I have also had good luck with The Honest Guys on YouTube, although it must be admitted that they are a little woo.
3) Melatonin.. A good trick is to set an alarm to take it an hour before you would like to be in bed, and to take it even if you're not ready to go to bed then, just to increase the odds of your sleepiness later.
4) Warm milk. . Does anyone know whether nondairy vegan milks work the same way?
5) Turn off your blue-light screens.. Again, common advice, but I'm not actually saying "don't look at screens," which seems much much harder. iPhones and I suspect other electronics have a setting where it automatically switches to warmer tones of light at the time you set, and that lets your mind get the rest without you having to put down the phone before you're ready.
6) Give yourself permission to relax.. This one can be tough, given everything that's happening, and everything that could and will happen. But whatever you need to do to let yourself know that anything you need to do can wait until you've rested, and that you are safe for at least the next eight hours? Do that.
7) Have something pleasant, engaging, but not too interesting to think about.. Fandom is great for this-- figure out what Hogwarts House all the Star Trek characters would be in. Figure out what cutie mark would make sense for everyone from the Imperial Radch. Or design a very good guest bedroom, or come up with a song lyric starting with each letter of the alphabet, or recite poetry to yourself. Figure out before you lie down what you're going to think about, and if your mind starts to drift to worries, acknowledge them and gently redirect it to figuring out which X-Men you would cast in a performance of Hamlet.
8) Rewrite your nightmares.. Many people can fall asleep just fine, but wake up with nightmares, and have trouble getting back to sleep. This doesn't work for everyone, but: try to rewrite the ending of your nightmare, with all the abilities available to you in dream logic. If you dreamed you were falling to your death, imagine that you dreamed that you sprouted wings. If you dreamed that everyone you loved was dying, imagine that you dreamed you had a magic spray bottle that could cure all illnesses, and bring people back from the dead. It's a good idea to try to wake all the way up before you try this for the first several times, so you don't end up with your anxiety twisting your revision back to nightmare. After you've had enough practice, though, you may be able to move pretty smoothly into this from the moment of getting free of the nightmare.
9) Do that thing that you're not doing because you're hoping to fall asleep, but it's keeping you awake.. Like, some things (e.g., your taxes) are much too complicated for this, but: go to the bathroom. Get a drink of water. Turn the heat up or down. Open or shut the window. Turn on the white noise machine. Write down the idea that you're worried you'll forget in the morning. You are clearly not just falling asleep despite it, so fix it, and then you can stop worrying about it.
10) Imagine that you are very heavy, and are sinking into the bed.. I find that this works better for me than the "tense and relax each muscle in turn" exercise, though of course feel free to do that if it works well for you. But just... notice that you are very heavy, too heavy to move, and that each of your muscles gently relaxes as it lets your weight down into the mattress, so that no part of you is straining to keep you upright.
11) Prayer.. This one will vary wildly per your beliefs, of course. Personally, I'm not so much asking whatever gods may be for anything; I imagine all the people I love, and do a lovingkindness meditation ("May they be well, may they be happy, may they be at peace."). It's just nice, and relaxing, to connect with whatever it is in the universe that you're glad of.
12) Resign yourself to not sleeping.. It feels so awful to lie in bed, feeling the minutes tick by, trying to will yourself into unconsciousness while the morning creeps ever-nearer. So... just give up. Decide that there is no point in fretting about it, because you just aren't sleeping tonight. But remember that relaxation and/or meditation will still give your body rest-- not as much rest as sleep, but definitely better than getting up and trying to do something. So take your time, relax-- maybe put on a relaxation tape, or soft music, maybe meditate, maybe focus on untensing your muscles. Remember that this rest is better than nothing, and that being a little tired tomorrow will not be the end of the world. Give up, and... chill.
There will almost certainly be more over time, so feel free to check back on this entry. But that seems like maybe enough for tonight.
Sweet dreams, all.
--R
*I'm sorry, by the way, that I have not been replying to the replies. Doing this is more journaling than I've done in a long time, because my free time with a computer is kind of limited. But let me make the blanket statement that I'm so, so glad that these entries are being useful to you! and I'm so glad to see that you're reading. Thank you, and welcome!
Easier said than done, right? But trouble sleeping is something that people are talking about a lot this week, and I certainly have many many suggestions for how to sleep better, so have a list.
Now, I'm not expecting that all of these will be new to you-- I would be surprised if they all were. But my hope is that a) some of them are new, and worth trying, and b) some of them are things you've tried before that worked for you, and it will remind you to do them again, and c) you may have some good tricks that are not on this list, which you can put in the replies.*
1) Exercise. I usually hesitate before suggesting this to people, but right now, staying in our homes, we are moving so much less than we usually do. No walking to the T, or biking to work, no being on our feet at work, some people are feeling really scared to leave the house and so having a lot of trouble getting that kind of exercise, and we are all much more stationary. And that can have pretty nasty effects on your mood, and your sleep (and your sleep can then affect your mood). So: try to be in motion. It doesn't have to be explicit exercise-- you can do lots of energetic cleaning, or furniture moving. You can go to an online dance party, or take a free online yoga class.. If you have small children, they would probably love for you to run around the living room with them, or carry them around, or even use them as your weights in strength training when you can't go to the gym. Just... try to be in motion more, every day.
2) Podcasts or audiobooks. These don't work for everyone, but if they work for you, they are particularly helpful-- it gives your mind something to focus on other than all your worried thoughts. Since the pandemic started, I have been falling asleep every night either to the audiobook of The Silmarillion as read by Martin Shaw, who has an amazing Intoning voice, or the Sleep With Me podcast. Sleep With Me bills itself as "Bedtime stories to help grown ups fall asleep in the deep, dark night." It is long, rambling, cheerfully inconsequential stories by a man who claims he is called Scooter, and whose creaky, dulcet tones will tell you about things that do not matter at all if you fall asleep in the middle of. It's caring, affirming (he always starts by welcoming, "ladies and gentlemen and friends from beyond the binary"), and I have never stayed awake more than about ten minutes into the podcast. I have also had good luck with The Honest Guys on YouTube, although it must be admitted that they are a little woo.
3) Melatonin.. A good trick is to set an alarm to take it an hour before you would like to be in bed, and to take it even if you're not ready to go to bed then, just to increase the odds of your sleepiness later.
4) Warm milk. . Does anyone know whether nondairy vegan milks work the same way?
5) Turn off your blue-light screens.. Again, common advice, but I'm not actually saying "don't look at screens," which seems much much harder. iPhones and I suspect other electronics have a setting where it automatically switches to warmer tones of light at the time you set, and that lets your mind get the rest without you having to put down the phone before you're ready.
6) Give yourself permission to relax.. This one can be tough, given everything that's happening, and everything that could and will happen. But whatever you need to do to let yourself know that anything you need to do can wait until you've rested, and that you are safe for at least the next eight hours? Do that.
7) Have something pleasant, engaging, but not too interesting to think about.. Fandom is great for this-- figure out what Hogwarts House all the Star Trek characters would be in. Figure out what cutie mark would make sense for everyone from the Imperial Radch. Or design a very good guest bedroom, or come up with a song lyric starting with each letter of the alphabet, or recite poetry to yourself. Figure out before you lie down what you're going to think about, and if your mind starts to drift to worries, acknowledge them and gently redirect it to figuring out which X-Men you would cast in a performance of Hamlet.
8) Rewrite your nightmares.. Many people can fall asleep just fine, but wake up with nightmares, and have trouble getting back to sleep. This doesn't work for everyone, but: try to rewrite the ending of your nightmare, with all the abilities available to you in dream logic. If you dreamed you were falling to your death, imagine that you dreamed that you sprouted wings. If you dreamed that everyone you loved was dying, imagine that you dreamed you had a magic spray bottle that could cure all illnesses, and bring people back from the dead. It's a good idea to try to wake all the way up before you try this for the first several times, so you don't end up with your anxiety twisting your revision back to nightmare. After you've had enough practice, though, you may be able to move pretty smoothly into this from the moment of getting free of the nightmare.
9) Do that thing that you're not doing because you're hoping to fall asleep, but it's keeping you awake.. Like, some things (e.g., your taxes) are much too complicated for this, but: go to the bathroom. Get a drink of water. Turn the heat up or down. Open or shut the window. Turn on the white noise machine. Write down the idea that you're worried you'll forget in the morning. You are clearly not just falling asleep despite it, so fix it, and then you can stop worrying about it.
10) Imagine that you are very heavy, and are sinking into the bed.. I find that this works better for me than the "tense and relax each muscle in turn" exercise, though of course feel free to do that if it works well for you. But just... notice that you are very heavy, too heavy to move, and that each of your muscles gently relaxes as it lets your weight down into the mattress, so that no part of you is straining to keep you upright.
11) Prayer.. This one will vary wildly per your beliefs, of course. Personally, I'm not so much asking whatever gods may be for anything; I imagine all the people I love, and do a lovingkindness meditation ("May they be well, may they be happy, may they be at peace."). It's just nice, and relaxing, to connect with whatever it is in the universe that you're glad of.
12) Resign yourself to not sleeping.. It feels so awful to lie in bed, feeling the minutes tick by, trying to will yourself into unconsciousness while the morning creeps ever-nearer. So... just give up. Decide that there is no point in fretting about it, because you just aren't sleeping tonight. But remember that relaxation and/or meditation will still give your body rest-- not as much rest as sleep, but definitely better than getting up and trying to do something. So take your time, relax-- maybe put on a relaxation tape, or soft music, maybe meditate, maybe focus on untensing your muscles. Remember that this rest is better than nothing, and that being a little tired tomorrow will not be the end of the world. Give up, and... chill.
There will almost certainly be more over time, so feel free to check back on this entry. But that seems like maybe enough for tonight.
Sweet dreams, all.
--R
*I'm sorry, by the way, that I have not been replying to the replies. Doing this is more journaling than I've done in a long time, because my free time with a computer is kind of limited. But let me make the blanket statement that I'm so, so glad that these entries are being useful to you! and I'm so glad to see that you're reading. Thank you, and welcome!
(no subject)
Date: 2020-04-04 02:11 am (UTC)Some additional resources for those looking for them: Getting the Sleep You Need from healthysleep.med.harvard.edu
(no subject)
Date: 2020-04-04 02:27 am (UTC)I've always had terrible insomnia, and one thing that also used to help was actually getting up and reading for an hour or so, or painting, or even doing a few dishes. Not something that required a lot of brainwork or enough effort to wake me up. Showers work well for this too. I usually get tired a lot sooner than I think! Again, this seems to go along with the "I give up, I'm not getting to sleep" mindset. And I'm still not sure why.
(no subject)
Date: 2020-04-04 01:45 pm (UTC)#9: I find this one useful when I have awakened in the middle of the night and have a tiny little thought that maybe I should drink some water and go to the bathroom. "Nooooo" thinks a part of my brain "so cozy lying stillllll" but if I listen to that part, then I am still lying still NOT SLEEPING 20 minutes later and have to go to the bathroom more urgently and drink water more urgently, whereas if I get up and do it, I can get back to sleep. Mileage, of course, varies.
(no subject)
Date: 2020-04-04 09:24 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2020-04-04 01:49 pm (UTC)not for me, but i don't know if that's universal or not